The SAD Life of Rich People: Trapped in the Rat Race
Hello, friends! People often talk about money. Money can buy you a bed, but not sleep. Money can buy you a watch, but not time. Money can buy you food, but not the desire to eat. This is the truth for many people.
But on the other hand, there are some who say, “If money can’t buy you happiness, then you do not know how to spend it.” If your money can’t make you happy, then you aren’t spending it well.
In this sense, there’s another saying: “Money can’t buy you happiness, but poverty can’t buy you anything.” So what is the truth? Does chasing after money and earning a lot of money give you more happiness? Are the richest people in the world the happiest people in the world? Let’s understand this in depth in this video.
The Fisherman and the Businessman
Friends, there’s a very famous story of a businessman and a fisherman. Let me tell you about it. One day, on a beautiful beach, a fisherman was fishing. He was lying down comfortably, enjoying the sea and the fresh air. His fishing rod was buried in the sand beside him. Just then a businessman passed by him and sees him lying down. He says to the fisherman that if he keeps lying down, he won’t be able to catch many fish, and that he needs to work harder to get more fish. The fisherman looked at him and asked what he should do instead. The businessman told him to buy a big net, because with a fishing rod, he can catch only one fish at a time. But if he has a big net, he can catch several fish at a time. The fisherman asks what he would do with so many fish. The businessman told him to sell the fish in the market obviously. He’ll earn money. The fisherman asked what he would do with that money. The businessman suggested buying a boat with that money, with many more nets, allowing him to catch more fish. And so he will make a lot more money. But then, what would he do with so much money, asked the fisherman?
By this point, the businessman starts getting irritated. Does this fisherman not understand? He could hire employees with that money, and the employees would catch more fish, and the fisherman would make more money selling those fish. But the fisherman still asked, “What next?” The businessman told him that he could do whatever he wants with all that money, eating the best food, partying, relaxing on the beach, whenever he wants to. He could relax and spend the rest of his life on the beach. Then the fisherman asks the businessman to look at him. That’s exactly what he was doing.
The Reality of Wealth: Elon Musk and Others
Does this story make sense to you, friends? Think about it. If that businessman hadn’t talked about relaxing on the beach after making a lot of money, the fisherman wouldn’t have had a punchline.
What if the businessman had said that he could drink the most expensive wine in the world becoming rich? What would the fisherman have said? He might have said that he doesn’t drink. But then, had the businessman said that after becoming rich, he could buy expensive clothes; the fisherman could have easily replied to it too, saying that he doesn’t need expensive clothes, because he is happy with his T-shirt.
But had the businessman said that with so much money, the fisherman could live in a 5-star hotel and enjoy the food there; are you wondering how would the fisherman reply to this? There’s a reply to everything. The fisherman could ask what’s the point of being in a 5 star hotel room, when the real peace is in nature. Fresh, clean air, the vast sea, and the trees on the coast, cooking the fish he caught himself, would be tastier than any food from a 5 star hotel.
Do you get the point? This story does make some sense. We see so many people around us who don’t wear expensive clothes, don’t eat in 5-star hotels, don’t earn a lot of money, but they are still happy and satisfied in their lives. But on the other hand, the opposite is also true. There are so many rich millionaires who are not happy in their lives.
For example, take Elon Musk. The richest man in the world. He tweeted in July 2017: “The reality is great highs, terrible lows, and unrelenting stress. Don’t think people want to hear about the last two.”
This is the truth. For a while, one may fly high, but they are at the risk of a great fall, all of this leads to a lot of stress. But people rarely want to hear about the last two.
The Price of Success: Elon Musk’s Daughter and Divorce Rates
Look at this report published in the Wall Street Journal last year: Elon Musk takes micro doses of ketamine to fight depression. However, he later downplayed it and said that depression is overdiagnosed in America. He said that in his friend circle he has seen that taking ketamine once in a while is a better option.
Take this person. This is Elon Musk’s daughter. She is 20 years old. 2 years ago, as soon as she turned 18, she filed a petition in the court claiming that she does not want to have any kind of relation with her father. If money could buy every happiness, Elon does not lack money. So why is their father-daughter relationship so strained? Last year, his biographer revealed that Elon was hurt by the fact that his daughter went no contact with him.
Why does his daughter not want to spend time with him? Elon Musk and his wife Justine Wilson divorced in 2008. After that, he married the English actress Talulah Riley. They went through a divorce two years after marriage. Then he had a relationship with Canadian musician Grimes. And after three years, they got separated too. Apart from this, his affairs have also been in the limelight. But none of them worked out. According to last year’s Insider report, Elon Musk is single now.
Why didn’t these women find happiness with the richest man in the world? You might think that Elon Musk’s case is an isolated example, but it is not. He is not the only billionaire to suffer so.
The second richest person in the world is Bernard Arnault. He got divorced too. Jeff Bezos is the third richest. He got divorced too. Apart from this, Larry Ellison, Bill Gates, and Sergei Brin, are among the top 10 richest people in the world. These 6 people have already got divorced.
Forbes magazine studied the billionaires in America and found that marriages of 49% of billionaires end in a divorce. That means every other billionaire is a divorcee. Arguably, the overall divorce rate in America is also quite high. It’s around 42%.
But the thing is that billionaires have no shortage of money. So why are they getting divorced despite that? This reminds me of the same thing. You can buy a house with your money, but not a family.
The Pursuit of More: Brothers Fighting Over Money
Even after being so rich, brothers fight among themselves. And for what? Over money. They may have millions already, but they won’t be content with that. They want more and more. They fight over this.
Liquor baron and the owners of Wave Cinemas, Ponty Chadha and his brother k!lled each other in mutual firing. You must have heard about the fight between Ambani brothers. Their court cases went on for many years. Both brothers made statements against each other in public. The matter got so bad that in 2009, the then Finance Minister, Pranab Mukherjee had to tell them that their corporate dispute had turned into a national entertainment, and to request them to solve it privately. Since it was affecting the markets.
In social media, in our society, many people see these billionaires as an inspiration, as a role model, and strive to become like them. But three years ago, when Elon Musk was asked how can one become like him, look at his answer: “If you have an advice to them, the young people who want to be like Elon Musk. What’s the advice to them?” “They shouldn’t wanna be.” “I think it sounds better than it is.” “I’m not sure I wanna be me.”
He asked why would anyone want to be like him? Saying that he doesn’t like being himself.
The Misery of Wealth: Therapists and Celebrities
The lives of many rich people and celebrities are this miserable. Look at the article from 2021: “I’m a therapist to the super-rich, they are as miserable as Succession make out.” He is referencing a TV show, what he means is that most of the billionaires with whom he has worked struggle with shame, guilt, and fear. They have trust issues. They suspect everyone, because of which their lives become stressful and miserable.
Some celebrities get so depressed that they commit su!cide. Pratyusha Banerjee, who became a household name after playing the lead role in the TV serial Balika Vadhu, one day we suddenly found out that she passed away. Hollywood actor Robin Williams, who was a renowned stand-up comedian, he used to make people laugh, his jolly face hid his sorrows and depression. Kurt Cobain, the lead singer of the rock band Nirvana, committed su!cide at the age of 27 when he was at the top of his career. None of them lacked money, but their money could not give them happiness.
There are some other famous names too, they were lucky enough to escape depression. Last year, in March, Kapil Sharma revealed that he was depressed. And that he had su!cidal tendencies. While promoting his film Zogato, he said that his depression phase has taught him to enjoy the smallest things in life.
Another famous name here is Deepika Padukone, one of the most successful actresses in India. She suffered from depression too. But on a positive note, she remained open about it. She promotes many initiatives for mental health awareness.
Apart from this, there are many people who might not be depressed, but their actions clearly show that they are dissatisfied with their life. Film actors whose films have earned billions of rupees but still in their bid to keep earning more and more, they do surrogate ads for tobacco products. Shah Rukh Khan, Akshay Kumar, Ajay Devgn, Ranveer Singh, Amitabh Bachchan, Virender Sehwag, Sunil Gavaskar, etc. Can you imagine their greed for money that they are ready to sacrifice their sense of social responsibility and conscience to earn more money? If they aren’t satisfied with billions of rupees, then will the few million rupees they earn by doing tobacco ads, give them a sense of satisfaction? I don’t think so.
The Importance of Happiness and Satisfaction
That’s why, friends, it is important to prioritize your happiness and satisfaction over money. But unfortunately, most people don’t do that. Most are blinded by their greed for money. Those who make earning money the #1 goal of their lives, think that they’ll find happiness and satisfaction only after they have a certain amount of wealth. But that’s untrue.
I’ve talked about this in detail in this course. In addition to being a Time Management course, it is a Happiness course too. Here, I teach you step-by-step, how you can achieve your goals in your life, maximize your productivity, and maximize the satisfaction in your life all at once.
The “Middle Way”: Finding True Happiness
Many of you might say that even if rich people are dissatisfied and are depressed, but so are the poor people. Poor people commit su!cide too. They suffer with depression too, and many poor people have family disputes too. They are dissatisfied with their lives too. You’re absolutely right to think so. I am not denying this. I am not saying that poor people are happier with their lives.
The point I want to make here is that the concept that rich people are more satisfied and happier than poor people is incorrect. If someone is really poor, he should be definitely helped out of his poverty. Romanticising poverty is wrong. You’d find some people doing this on social media. They share photos of poor people, showing a poor child studying under a street light, for example. They say that it’s inspiring. But we should not feel inspired by such photos. We should feel sad seeing such photos, because we still have such children in our country who are forced to study under street lights. As a country, all of us should try together to give each child the same starting line as other children, to provide every child with a certain standard of living.
Friends, I believe that money is like a base. A certain level of money is needed to achieve a certain living standard. Having a decent house, ensuring that your family is medically insured, providing good education to your children, not having to think twice before spending money on basics like food, water, and grocery. I have acknowledged this in my course as well. To a certain extent, attaining happiness can only be possible with a certain base level of money.
So the question is, how much? How much money should one strive to earn? The exact amount will be different for everyone. But for everyone, the money required to maximize their satisfaction and happiness will remain at a certain level. And this level of money isn’t as high as you might think.
I have explained this in detail in the course, but the conclusion of this topic is very obvious. Saying that your 20s and 30s are for hustle, so you need to keep hustling until you can relax in your 40s, is sheer stupidity. Believe me, friends, this period when you’re told to work and earn money, is also the period when you need to enjoy your life. This period of life won’t ever come back.
The Race for Money and the Importance of Self-Reflection
Many people’s mindset is that because their current car cost ₹500,000, they need to buy a more expensive car after that, until they can finally buy a Mercedes. The only thing that is really worth buying is self-image. But money can’t buy that. You need to improve your self-image so much that you won’t need to buy a Mercedes just to prove something.
Move out of the world of social media where everyone is showing off. The lives you see on social media, people don’t actually lead such lives. The rich people, celebrities, smiling faces that you can see while scrolling on Instagram, the reality behind them is often completely different.
Showing off on social media, trying to make others jealous, and being jealous of others, you need to get out of this circle. Because this culture promotes a race for money. If you see someone with a luxury watch, you feel the need to buy one for yourself. So that makes you want to work harder. You might want to buy an expensive car you saw on social media. And that pushes you to work harder and make more money.
This problem gets even bigger when some motivational gurus and billionaires encourage this. You might have seen an ad on YouTube multiple times. “Why aren’t you a millionaire yet?” “If you’re above 30, and not making ₹10 million, then there’s something really, really wrong.” As if being a millionaire is the only real purpose in this world.
Some time ago, companies like White Hat Jr and BYJU’s did the same. They told people that if they didn’t buy their course, their child would be left behind. Selling a course is not inherently wrong, I sell my courses too. But the way the courses are pitched is vastly different. I ask you to buy this course, to learn about something new, to learn new skills, that will add meaning to your life, this can help you with your employment opportunities, and help you progress in your career. But asking why you’re not a millionaire yet, as if buying this course will make you a millionaire, this is sheer madness.
Money is a by-product of your work, the returns of your work and efforts. Your earnings should not become your work. Such people tell you one more thing: “Retire early at the age of 45.” And what will you do after retiring early at 45? Will you spend the rest of your life in mindless consumption?
Finding Purpose Beyond Money: Karma Yoga and The Top 5 Regrets
Have you heard about ‘Karma Yoga?’ One of the core principles of Hindu philosophy. Besides this, there is ‘Gyaan Yoga,’ the inherent desire to learn new things, to know about new things. And then there is ‘Bhakti Yoga.’ Money should not be the top-most goal of your life. Earning money should not be the only goal of your life.
These motivational gurus show you the Elon Musk and Mukesh Ambani as examples and try to coerce you into doing this, telling you that you will be the next Elon Musk. You can be the next Mukesh Ambani. As if being a scientist, teacher, doctor, dentist, architect, sociologist, anthropologist, historian, aren’t lucrative fields at all. And everyone wants to become money-minting businessmen.
These people don’t realize that people like Elon Musk and Mukesh Ambani might actually be jealous of some average people. People who are more satisfied and happier than them in their lives.
“There was a point in life when I had to choose between time and money. And I thought, I can’t beat Mukesh Ambani in terms of money. He has a bit of an upper hand there. What will be life like if Mukesh is better than me? So I decided to change the game. I chose time. Let’s compete now, Mukesh. Let’s play my game. Now, on Monday mornings, I listen to Radiohead for 4 hours. And I just wonder, about what Mukesh would be doing then. He’d be in meetings on Monday mornings. Loser. I won.”
This isn’t just a joke, there is some tinge of reality behind this comedy skit. An Australian nurse’s diary proved this comparison of wealth and time. Her name is Bronnie Ware. She was working in palliative care with terminally ill patients. Those people who have only a little time to live due to some terminal disease. She asked them about the biggest regrets of their lives. She wrote a book on her observations: The Top 5 Regrets of the Dying. The five common things that people regret the most when they are about to die.
First, people wish they had the courage to live a life true to themself, instead of the life others expected of them. They regret not having lived on their own terms, as well as having spent their lives pleasing others.
The second regret is that they wish they hadn’t worked as hard as they did. They regret being focused too much on their work, career, and money. They regret not spending more time with their family.
Third, they wish they had the courage to express their feelings. They regret not having the courage to express their true feelings.
Fourth, they wish they had stayed in touch with their friends. They regret losing their friends along the way.
And fifth, they wish they had let themself be happier. They regret not allowing themselves to be happier with what they had. They regret not pursuing their happiness.
On their deathbeds, not a single person regretted not earning more money. Think about it, this should tell you the real worth of money.
The True Value of Life: Beyond Material Possessions
Friends, think about it, on your deathbed, will you truly regret not buying a Mercedes car? Will you regret not buying a luxury watch? Or some expensive, branded clothes?
This is why we need to self-reflect into our lives while we’re here. Hinduism and Jainism preach the principle of non-possessiveness. Don’t try to possess, take over everything. Don’t try to own everything.
What was Gautam Buddha’s message about the Middle Way? “Do not renounce the world, live here. Enjoy, but do not immerse yourself totally in things. Freedom lies in minimalism.”
The more money you earn, the more things you own, the more maintenance will you need. Many people become slaves to their lifestyle in this rat race to earn more and more money. Whatever you buy today in excitement, tomorrow, it will become old. And you will lose your interest in it. Instead, you will want to buy something else. And this becomes the beginning of a perpetual cycle of buying and consuming, buying more and consuming more but you fail to get permanent happiness anywhere.
Finding True Happiness: Purpose, Sharing, and Helping Others
Real happiness is hidden someplace else. Doing what you truly enjoy doing. Having a sense of purpose in life. Helping people, sharing things with people. In Hinduism, Daan (donation) is given a lot of importance. In Islam, Zakat or donation, is one of the five pillars. In Sikhism, there is the concept of Dasvandh, that one-tenth of one’s income should be donated.
What are the other things that will truly make you happiness? I have talked about it in detail in this course.
This video was different from my usual style; I hope you like it. If you did, let me know in the comments below, and feel free to suggest more topics you’d like me to talk about.
Thank you very much!
